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Opening the Door to Reconciliation and Healing
Sitting in on a loved one’s death watch can be a trying time in more ways than one can count, circumstances to which many of us can probably relate. It can be an especially stressful, even openly hostile, experience when incompatible family members are brought together for such an ordeal, one whose duration and developments are impossible to predict. Dealing with the impending grief associated with such situations can further fuel these discordant fires, making for severely strained relations. But, at some point, the onerous weight of these circumstances can unexpectedly crack open a door of opportunity: The mutually shared heartache of those involved can, seemingly inadvertently, provide conditions conducive to forgiveness and reconciliation, developments that can foster wondrous and much-needed healings for all concerned. Such are the dynamics explored in the intense new family drama, “His Three Daughters” (web site, trailer).
Vince Dyson (Jay O. Sanders) is nearing the end of his life. The terminally ill New Yorker has been placed under home hospice care in his city apartment with little time left. But the exact length of that dwindling time frame is impossible to gauge. And, even though he’s under the care of a case worker, Angel (Rudy Galvan), and a visiting nurse (Jasmine Bracey), their efforts aren’t enough to attend to all of his needs. That’s where others must step in to supplement the work of these professional caregivers.
Enter Vince’s three daughters: Katie (Carrie Coon), an uptight, self-important middle-aged suburban wife and mother burdened by an ungrateful family of her own; Christina (Elizabeth Olsen), a sensitive, loving young wife and mother who has traveled across country to pitch in with her father’s care; and Rachel (Natasha Lyonne), a smart-mouthed stoner who spends much of her time lounging around, watching TV, toking up and placing bets on sporting events. At first glance, one may have difficulty imagining that these three women could possibly be siblings. Some of their differences might be attributable to the fact that they haven’t spent much time together in many years. What’s more, they each apparently grew up with Vince somewhat separately from one another, with each of them drawing upon their largely independent experiences in the formation of their outlooks, attitudes and personalities, conditions not especially favorable for creating a cooperative, family-oriented atmosphere. But here they are now, all holed up together in Dad’s small apartment, trying to work out the circumstances they’re faced with and sorting out their often-estranged relationships with one another.
Given their respective backgrounds and demeanors, it’s obvious that Katie, Christina and Rachel don’t exactly get along well with one another. Katie, the “responsible” one, appears to be on reasonably good terms with Christina (as wives and mothers, they share a common bond in these regards), but she has major issues with Rachel, whom she sees as the epitome of irresponsibility. Katie constantly complains about her younger sibling’s laziness, drug habits, lack of initiative and seeming carelessness when it comes to their father’s care. She also suspects that the only reason Rachel is present now is so that she can take over the rent-controlled apartment where she has been residing with her dad; with her name on the lease, the apartment would become hers upon his passing. But are circumstances really that simple?
Rachel, by contrast, sees Katie as needlessly cross, neurotic and ill-tempered. She looks upon her as a major control freak, driven in large part by Katie’s problems with her own household (particularly her rebellious teenage daughter). Katie also seems to be unaware of the demanding ongoing care that Rachel had quietly been providing Vince before he entered the hospice protocol, rigors that no doubt took a toll on her (and may, among other conditions, have contributed to her frequently lighting up). However, as someone who readily doesn’t speak up for herself (her sassy attitude notwithstanding), Rachel doesn’t make all of her feelings and experiences known. In fact, about the only one who steps up to defend her is her boyfriend, Benji (Jovan Adepo), who doesn’t hesitate to make it known that Rachel is being judged unfairly. In response, Katie ridicules Benji’s presence in the apartment at such a time as this, unaware that he and Vince were buddies, frequently watching sporting events together – the same ones that Vince and Rachel both placed bets on.
Meanwhile, Christina, as the caring, empathetic soul that she is, frequently finds herself caught in the middle. She tries to play peacemaker between Katie and Rachel but is often up against a flurry of hostility that’s more than she can handle. Katie condescendingly views Christina as something of a Pollyanna, while Rachel sees her as a well-meaning mediator but someone who’s clearly in over her head. Consequently, Christina often feels sidelined, treated as just another caregiver and not an integral part of the family. These conditions add to the homesickness she already feels for her own daughter and husband, this being the first time she’s been separated from them for any length of time.
As all of this drama is playing out, Vince’s condition worsens, adding more stress to the situation. Angel – an ironic name for a hospice worker – regularly meets with the women to help keep them focused on the circumstances at hand. He tries to tactfully but honestly inform them of what’s happening, what they can likely expect and what upcoming decisions they should collectively be prepared to make. That, of course, can be difficult – almost a distraction – with everything else that’s going on between them. Katie, Christina and Rachel continually feel as though they’re being piled upon by this scenario. And, in the midst of all this, they frequently feel as though they’re never any closer to attaining an acceptable resolution to what they’re up against, not only with Dad, but also with each other. So, with that in mind, one can’t help but wonder how prepared they will be when the inevitable finally arrives.
Note how I have routinely referred to Katie, Christina and Rachel in the foregoing text without using the word “sisters.” That’s because, in reality, they don’t seem like sisters; true, they’re all Vince’s daughters, but that doesn’t necessarily make them sisters. Technically, they should probably be considered as such, but, if they’re to make their way through these trying times, perhaps they should start acting more like sisters and less like mere daughters. Can they do that? In the end, it’s likely to come down to whether they can believe in that possibility. But is that attainable?
The siblings’ beliefs are crucial to how this scenario unfolds, since they play a central role in how events progress, as these intangible resources are inherently responsible for the nature of our existence. It’s hard to tell whether Katie, Christina and Rachel (or any of us for that matter) have ever heard of this way of thinking. But, if they ever hope to resolve their differences and put their -relationships on a new, more agreeable footing, they need to examine their beliefs and how they can employ them in a positive, mutually constructive way.
Fortunately, one of the most beneficial attributes of our beliefs is that they can take any form we desire – meaning that we can tailor their nature in any way we like. This, of course, can be valuable in shaping the reality we wish to create, including everything within it. This, in turn, applies to such innate elements as the relationships we have with others in our world. So whatever connections develop among us and our peers are a direct result of our own choosing, regardless of whatever forms those relationships and their underlying beliefs take.
That naturally raises the question, if we could manifest anything we want in this regard, then why would we materialize relationships fraught with tension, conflict, bitterness and antagonism? Some might contend that they’re a product of our experiences and the way we react to them, which is, admittedly, true to a certain extent. However, we must also ask ourselves why we have chosen to react in the ways that we do. There are no universal rules dictating that we must respond in a particular way. If we believe we’ve been wronged by someone else, for example, we can choose to be forgiving just as readily as we can choose to be begrudging or judgmental. The key consideration thus becomes, why do we choose to react as we do? And, if our beliefs and subsequent responses result in an outcome that we find fundamentally unsatisfying, what must we do to change it to something more to our liking?
This is particularly true in the relationship between Katie and Rachel. As the strong-willed individual that she is, Katie wants her world to be full of control and order, and Rachel’s behavior flies squarely in the face of that. Katie is so tied to this thinking that it begins to become annoying and off-putting, and Rachel’s often-unconcerned responses to her sibling’s overbearing demands irritate her to no end. They each choose the particular way they behave and react, and, given that those responses are diametrically opposed to one another, those differences lead to the ongoing conflict that permeates their relationship in this story (and that was likely in place for a long time beforehand, too).
Because they have both gathered for these highly dramatic circumstances, it could be that Katie and Rachel have come together not only to care for their father, but also to work out the differences between them, even if they don’t consciously recognize that objective. On some level, they seem to want to work things out, and, because of that, they need each other to accomplish that goal. Their reactions to one another are thus integral elements of playing out a life lesson that they each need to learn. Katie needs to learn how to lighten up, while Rachel needs to learn how to become more responsible. Their conflict – and the underlying beliefs that manifested that situation – is a necessary means to help them form new beliefs for learning their respective lessons and creating a healthier, more harmonious relationship moving forward.
The question in this, of course, is can they accomplish this goal? Fortunately for them, they have assistance available to them to help facilitate these sought-after outcomes. That’s where the efforts of Christina and Angel come into play. As noted before, Christina believes in playing the role of peacemaker and seeks to implement her expertise in this area to help out her squabbling sisters. And Angel, as an outside de facto facilitator, is present to help keep all three siblings focused on what they’ve come together for in the first place. He helps to guide them into recognizing the common ground that exists among them in this situation and to not lose sight of it as they care for their father. Their belief in working together for his well-being and comfort in his final days provides them with something that they can and should focus on – and that they can all draw upon in the process of forging stronger relationships with one another.
In many ways, then, the nature of the “death watch” unfolding here is both literal and metaphorical. It’s literal in that it involves the events connected with Vince’s passing. But it’s also metaphorical in the sense that it represents the passing away of the old relations among Katie, Christina and Rachel. The death of the siblings’ toxic feelings toward each other in favor of something more civil, congenial and supportive is just as significant and transitional as what’s transpiring with their Dad. In fact, Vince’s passing is an integral aspect of the aforementioned common ground, one targeted at drawing the daughters together and intended to quietly inspire new beliefs among them to foster new and more enlightened relationships among them for the future.
“His Three Daughters” is thus as much a story about the siblings as it is about their father. It’s also an insightful look at the choices we make and how our beliefs in them lead to what materializes in our lives. We can arrive at any number of different outcomes, but we need to recognize that we’re the driving forces behind what ultimately turns up. That shines a bright light on the importance of recognizing the nature of our beliefs and how we put them to use. They’re powerful tools for bringing about our respective destinies, not only in terms of the particulars that arise, but also in terms of their qualities and character. In light of the foregoing, we can thus draw chaos into our existence just as readily as harmony, but we must never lose sight of the fact that we’re the ones who determine what results through the power of our choices and beliefs.
In his latest feature outing, writer-director Azazel Jacobs has crafted an authentic story about what often occurs under difficult conditions like these, astutely blending intense drama, scathing personal interactions, dark humor and hopes for reconciliation against a backdrop of edgy anguish, searing emotional pain and pervasive uncertainty. The picture’s crisp writing and stellar performances (especially Lyonne’s truly outstanding portrayal) drive the unfolding of this gripping domestic saga, often leaving viewers uncomfortably squirming in their seats as raw, long-repressed feelings surface unrestrained. To be sure, some of the transition sequences in the narrative could use better refinement to keep the overall story on track for what follows, but, then, their handling in this manner could arguably be chalked up to the ubiquitous atmosphere of doubt lingering over this situation, a determination that audience members will have to make for themselves. Still, “His Three Daughters” is indeed one of the best releases of 2024 thus far, one that deserves serious consideration as awards season begins, particularly in the writing and acting categories. It’s also a powerful cautionary tale for any of us who may be faced with having to undergo a scenario like this at some point, providing us with valuable insight into how we might want to conduct ourselves when these trying times arise, especially if we want something better for ourselves and our loved ones going forward. The film is currently streaming on Netflix.
In times of need, we’d all like to think that we can draw upon the love and support of those we’re supposedly closest to in order to get through those trying times. Sadly, though, as ideal as that may sound, it’s something that’s often easier to envision than to experience. Emotional baggage, old resentments and longstanding hurts can get in the way, conditions based on beliefs that we may find difficult to shake. However, in theory, holding on to those feelings and the beliefs driving them is just as easy as making a deliberate, concerted effort to change them to something more amenable. So which option do we choose? The key factor in this decision is us and our willingness to chart a new course. It may be regrettable that it takes circumstances like these to help bring about such change, but, if the goal is one that we’d sincerely like to achieve, then we should at least be open to the possibility of what such opportunities afford, no matter what shape they make take upon their arrival. After all, in the end, the outcome may be more fulfilling than what we could have imagined, particularly when compared to the seemingly relentless unpleasantries we’ve been holding onto. As this story illustrates, our time together can pass us by more quickly than we often realize. It’s with that in mind, then, that we should seek to make the most of it while we have the chance, as it’s unlikely to ever come again.
A complete review is available by clicking here.
New Movies for October
Join yours truly and show host Frankie Picasso for looks at five new films and a film festival wrap-up on the upcoming movie review edition of the Frankiesense & More video podcast, to begin airing Thursday October 24 at 1 pm ET. Tune in on Facebook or YouTube for all the lively chat and movie fun!
Wrapping Up the Reeling Film Festival
The 42nd annual edition of Chicago’s Reeling International LGBTQ+ Film Festival is now in the books, having featured an array of narrative, documentary and short films in theaters and online. The event featured a strong lineup of offerings this year, perhaps the best I’ve ever seen at this festival. In all, I managed to catch 12 films during the festival’s two-week run. So, with that said, check out what I watched and what I thought at “Wrapping Up Reeling 2024,” available by clicking here.
Thoughtful Sci-fi on a Budget
Can polished, entertaining sci-fi effectively be delivered on a shoestring budget and under a tight shooting schedule? If writer-director Zach Clark’s “The Becomers” (web site, trailer) is any indication, the answer is a resounding “yes.” Add to this ambitious mix a sharply written story and script, skillful film editing, an innate quirkiness, a wry satirical bent and inventive, impeccably timed humor, and viewers have got a top-notch, quasi-campy sci-fi comedy on their hands, one well worth the watch.
The filmmaker’s latest tells the story of a pair of star-crossed alien lovers who manage to escape their dying planet and come to Earth but are now desperately trying to find one another once again. It can be a challenge given their unfamiliarity with the ways of their new home, as well as their inescapable need to regularly appropriate (albeit, somewhat surprisingly, seemingly innocently) the bodies of human hosts (think a far less menacing, more sentimental version of “Invasion of the Body Snatchers,” with its inherently grim events supported, ironically, by a sweet, but unusual, and certainly undeniable love story). Eventually, however, the differences between the two worlds invariably catch up with the duo, with their frequent (and often-improvised and opportunistic) switches involving them in an array of diverse scenarios populated by such characters as a woman in the process of giving birth, a cult of radical (but politically and spiritually oriented reformist) terrorists, and a corrupt high-ranking politician and his largely dysfunctional family.
In telling this tale, the film serves up a big platter of laughs (some guilty pleasure-level goofy, others supremely witty and genuinely inspired), accompanied by ample introspections into such topics as gender and racial identity, the undeserved clout of crooked government officials, the metaphysics behind the nature of “being,” and the complicated relationship between survival and remorse, not to mention a whole lot about love. And it’s all topped off by a fine, obviously tight-knit acting ensemble, many of whose members’ roles don’t necessarily require much from them, but all of whom play their parts in ways that elevate them to unexpected levels of excellence and eloquence, more than one might ordinarily expect from a movie in this genre.
That’s quite a list of achievements for a low-cost indie production of any kind, let alone one with the more demanding budget requirements and constraints typically associated with science fiction releases. But that’s where this picture’s production crew has really risen to the occasion by devising simple yet innovative ways to dazzle without breaking the bank, a brilliant accomplishment. If I had any reservation about this film, it would probably be that it’s a little slow to get rolling, but that’s more than made up for by the overall quality of this offering.
If you enjoy quality filmmaking made up of the foregoing elements, as well as one that gives you a lot to think about between chuckles, you owe it to yourself to catch this one (preferably on a big screen, if possible). Like me, you’ll probably come away from it pleasantly surprised for what it delivers – not to mention encouraged by impressively illustrating what the film industry can achieve when it earnestly puts its mind to it.
When Reality Exceeds Its Boundaries
Biopics are among the most common films being made these days. Some are great, some are decent, and others are more than a little conventional, following rote formats so meticulously that they can turn out shallow or dull. But, when it comes to telling the story of someone wholly unconventional, someone larger than life and the embodiment of surrealistic sensibilities, the tried and true simply won’t work. And that’s certainly the case with enigmatic artist Salvador Dalí, whose unusual paintings nearly always defied description and classification, the subject of the inventive new film biography, “Daaaaaalí!” (web site, trailer).
Dalí was indeed one of a kind. In addition to being a source of wholly unique artworks, he was a shameless self-promoter with an ego the size of the planet and a capricious personality as eccentric as his creations. He often spoke about himself in the third person and spouted statements that required those skilled in the cryptic arts to decipher. And he routinely pushed the boundaries of reality in his craft, understanding that what we’re most familiar with in our existence is but a shadow of the possibilities open to any of us.
So, with a subject like this, a formula biography simply would not work. Fortunately, that’s precisely the thinking that writer-director Quentin Dupieux employed in coming up with this outrageously funny, eminently bizarre offering about an individual with a truly singular vision. In many ways, the film is a cinematic experiment in storytelling, enlivening its narrative in a manner as surreal as one of Dalí’s works. It’s rarely grounded in the straightforward, taking on dream-like qualities with running jokes, repeated but altered sequences and recurring characters that intertwine with one another in unexpected, genuinely out-there ways. In this regard, it’s a treatise on pushing the boundaries of creativity, both in what we manifest and how we envision going about doing so.
The picture loosely follows the efforts of an aspiring journalist (Anaïs Demoustier) to secure an interview with her subject but who is routinely met with unrealistic, unforeseen obstacles (nearly always whimsically implemented by Dalí himself) in her attempts to pull it off. And, as the movie unfolds, it becomes impossible to follow any sense of grounded reasoning in trying to figure out what’s going on and where it might be headed (so don’t even try). Instead, just sit back and enjoy the absurdity of it all – the very same attitude that one needs to employ when gazing upon one of the artist’s paintings.
This highly fitting approach to telling Dalí’s story works brilliantly, especially coming from a filmmaker who has his own offbeat sensibilities about art, as seen in such prior releases as “Deerskin” (2019) and “Smoking Causes Coughing” (2022). In fact, “Daaaaaalí!” is so quirky and breaks the mold in so many ways that it even features five different actors (Edouard Baer, Jonathan Cohen, Gilles Lellouche, Pio Marmaï and Didier Flamand) portraying the protagonist. And, to his credit, the director thankfully keeps the runtime short at 1:18:00 so as not to overstay his welcome and let the innate joke become tiresome.
Still, with that said, some might nevertheless find this a frustrating watch. But, if you’re willing to suspend logic and convention (as you’re clearly supposed to do), you’re likely to find that this hilarious little gem will tickle your funny bone in myriad, unanticipated ways. After all, if the film’s subject defies easy categorization, the last thing a director should do is needlessly confine him to a claustrophobic little box. Fortunately, that’s exactly the pitfall this release successfully manages to avoid. And that’s important to remember where, as here, reality exceeds its boundaries.
Copyright © 2024, by Brent Marchant. All rights reserved.
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